I'm Guessing I Have A.D.D - Heck What's One More Label? LOL.

I'm not sure why staff Katie at my volunteer job likes me to call in sick still.  I have been calling in sick for most of the past 2 1/2 months and she knows I'm on sabbatical :-P!  But I think its nice and also a good motivator to get well.  She knows what's going on for me and seems very caring about the whole thing.  She is a really caring person to everyone it seems.  Sweet....

I did try to do some self-care today which has become a rarity except for ingesting herbal stuff (but I did that too - not what you are thinking but...).  I first started just at the computer while browsing Twitter profiles and Facebook groups.  I started breathing out rapidly.  This breathing is called breath of fire.  I learned this in yoga.  It does feel good and wakes you up a bit, lol.  Then I was reading on my Yoga forum on Facebook  this one person was having anxiety and yoga was not enough so people were suggesting meditation.  So I did 10 minutes of a sitting meditation. 

After the 10 minutes were up I felt such endorphins from the concentration and constant deep breathing.  It was sweet.  I wanted to meditate all day, lol, but then I also want to do a million other things and it's good to start at mediation bit by bit, or so I heard...

I have been hearing from different people that I may have A.D.D (attention deficit disorder) so I have started telling people that I may have it.  I know in grade school ever since I was 6 I was told I had a learning disability.  They called it a visual tracking problem.  In university the learning specialist explained my problem for the first time.  She said that when I am reading I unconsciously space out and miss things.  I even do that on this blog while proof reading.  It's really embarrassing!  Thing is though I don't only space out while reading.  I do it all the time.  So I think its A.D.D.  I have joined a Facebook group for A.D.D and they are telling my story, so, ya know.

I was thinking about being retested a few years back but it's $1500 for the test and since there is some much else going on for me that could be causing this problem i.e. the lithium has made it worse, my ptsd, my general anxiety is usually quite high and I am even have had possible head injury from birth because of my hydrocephalus and the lack of treatment I got for it in the beginning.   I have been tested for head injury but this was years ago and they didn't have all the testing faculties that they now do.  So, I will have to just diagnose myself.  Okie dokie????

I was proud of myself today because I drove!!!  Well, I drove down our small dead end street that is, lol.  I got a good idea of how driving on pure snow feels like.   I have driven on pure snow before.  It's a bit slippy, yep!  I try to avoid snowy days and then usually the main roads clear up soon after a snow fall.

I am taking care of my car though.  I clear the snow off of it and let it run everyday or every other day.  It's like one of my children :-P.  I can't drive any further at the moment until my anxiety calms down because if i left our quiet dead-end street there is a country road where the cars boot along at 60 km an hour!  NOOOOO thanks :-D.  Well someday but but sloooowly....