King Bob The Cat And Can I Feel Any More Tired?

I am exhausted after a very poor sleep last night. I had to take my prn zyprexa at 1am.  I was wide awake and had that racing feeling inside.  3 hours later I woke up because I heard a noise was still as wired as the night before.

Today, I am walking around the house 'drunk/ dizzy -like' unable to make the granola I had planned too for today.  I cannot for the life of me sleep in the day-time as a rule.  Cat naps only occasionally...

Luckily I have not felt a panic attack that it has seemed to bring on the last 4 times I have ingested it.  There is an interaction between my lithium and zyprexa so it's really not in my head.  Thankfully I have been spared this time. 

My anxiety was brought on by my fears about my new therapist and her wanting me to eat (this requires shopping - and the huge anxiety that that brings me);  the dog eating the cats food after the gate wasn't shut (the dog went home this am after 6 weeks in our care!), and then Kerri refused to take me food shopping.  She finally agreed after I was crying and shaking knowing that we couldn't go today because of the huge storm we are having...

We had a date to go the grocery store yesterday since last week.  Kerri had told me she would take me because we were going to get food for a pot-luck we were suppose to be attending today so figured I would pick up some stuff for me (but due to the snowstorm the city has closed down in many areas and we are staying home and safely off the roads).  

I told Kerri it's OK, I understand about not going to the pot-luck, but I haven't been food shopping for 10 days.  2 days ago she got food for her and Kendra I knew I had some food to last me for a couple more days so it didn't bother me to see lots food coming into the house.  Mostly what I needed badly is fruit anyway.    Well, she did get me bananas but that's not enough.  I like to have at least 3 different fruits a day and that won't last me 10 days or 2 weeks or whenever I can get her to take me.

My case-manager Jenn gave me the website for an on-line grocery-store and I was all excited.  Then when I looked at their selection they only sell one organic item - strawberries.  I would love those strawberries because Kerri and her daughter went out food shopping together last night and ended up getting me some stuff but said they were all out of produce for organic fruits.  On-line it would cost $4.99 for the strawberries.  I need strawberries!  This is the same price for the 1 litre bin but then factor in the $12  charge for the delivery and packing....

Anywhoo, here is a funny picture Kerri directed and I took of Bob just before the friction started yesterday. Kerri's cats are so chill. Speckle would never put up with this, hehe.